Undone
by Coneflower Adams
Summary: [updated Feb. 17] Nightmares of the abduction are starting to haunt Charlie in his sleep. Will remembering what happen unravel him or make him stronger?
1. Taken

**UNDONE**

_Writer note: This is my second LOST fic I've posted so far! I've had this one in my head ever since the last new episode aired. Enjoy!_

"Where's Jack?" Charlie asked, but all Ethan did was stare at them. No, he was staring at Claire. Charlie could see the transfixed look in his eyes, and it ran an icy shiver down his spine. He glanced at Claire. A dazed and fearful look covered her face. Charlie quickly slid an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close to him. He felt her hand trembling in his, and squeezed it in reassurance.

"What's the matter, Ethan?" asked Charlie cautiously, trying his best to steady his voice from sounding nervous. "Where's Jack?"

"Jack isn't coming" Ethan replied in a frighteningly monotone voice. He took a step forward. "No one is coming."

Charlie knew it was now or never if he wanted to get Claire away from this threat. He pulled her behind him, but that only made Ethan's stone cold eyes harden more.

"Claire, get out of here!" Charlie yelled as Ethan rushed forward at them. He dropped the duffle he was carrying.

Claire barely had time to run when Ethan tackled Charlie to the ground. Ethan was on top of him, his large hands around the rock star's neck. Charlie grasped desperately for anything, but all he could find was grass.

Suddenly, Ethan was knocked off him. Charlie rolled to his side, gasping for air. He ignored the stars circling his vision, and dashed to Claire's side. She was holding her duffle, anger burning in her eyes.

"Get out of here, I said!"

"But, I couldn't leave…"

"Yes, you can!"

Claire felt Charlie's hand push on her back. But, a cry followed and she had to turn to see what happened. Ethan had tackled Charlie again, sitting on his back and pinning him to the ground. He yanked Charlie's head back by his hair. In a flash, he whipped out a knife and held it to Charlie's exposed neck.

"If you run or scream, Claire", Ethan stared intensely at her shaking figure. "I will slice his throat open. You don't want his blood on your hands, do you?"

Claire bit her bottom lip; tears rolling freely down her cheeks. She shook her head. "What do you want with us?"

"I think you know why I want you" Ethan replied, evilly. Claire's eyes grew wide. Charlie muttered, "Bastard", but thankful it wasn't heard.

"No" she whimpered, hands wrapping protectively on her belly.

"Yes." Ethan ran the cool steel of the blade across Charlie's neck, preparing to slice at any moment. "Will you come with me?"

"I'll go with you" Claire caved. "Please don't hurt him!" she said louder. She could not draw her eyes away from the sight of Charlie lying helplessly on his stomach.

"Claire" Charlie wheezed, but Ethan yanked his hair to silence him.

The last thing Charlie saw was the unforgivable horror on Claire's face. He could feel her though, when they started walking. Her hand trembled in his, but he held on firmly and refused to let her go. Ethan was behind them, and Charlie felt the knife poke his back when Ethan felt they weren't going fast enough.

They walked for what seemed like hours, but was only a matter of 20 minutes. No one spoke, save for Ethan ordering to 'stop' or 'turn'. Finally, the last 'stop' came.

"No! Please!" Charlie suddenly heard Claire scream. She was holding onto him for dear life, but something ripped her from his side. Charlie reached out desperately to find her. All he could find was air. His hand shot to the blindfold obscuring his vision, but someone kicked him, sending him to his knees.

Claire screamed his name over and over. Hands seized Charlie's arms from behind, holding him still as someone else wrapped vines around his neck. He had an idea of what that meant - strangling or hanging. Either way, Charlie knew he was going to die. But dying wasn't what he was worried about.

"The others will find you, Claire! They'll come for you!" he yelled, quickly. The vines tightened.

He heard Claire sobbing from a short distance.

"I love you, Claire" he choked out. "Don't watch! Look away!"

As he felt himself being lifted into the air, his lungs began to burn and the sound of Claire's screams as she was dragged away rang in his ear.

_TBC..._


	2. Phoenix out of the ashes

He woke, bolting upright, to her screams echoing in his head again. Charlie peered around wildly, disoriented, but soon he realized where he was. He was safe at the caves, unlike Claire. Painful stabs shot through him. The memories of the abduction had returned with a vengeance. For a week, all he felt was the guilt of failing to protect Claire. Then the nightmares started.

The first nightmare was only sounds and distance voices, but after that, he could see the attack and hear every word that was spoken clearly. He found it no use in telling the others what had happened. It wouldn't help in finding Claire. Everyone had guessed why Ethan wanted her. The baby, it had to be for the baby. Poor, sweet Claire - he'd hear them say. And, yet, no one was really doing anything about it. As much as he wanted to, he couldn't throw it in their faces. He was just as guilty of not searching for her as anyone else there.

"Charlie, it's okay" Jack said, kneeling beside him and gripping his shoulder. "It was only a dream. You're safe"

He turned to Jack, eyes distant and heart pounding. "But Claire isn't"

"Come sit with me, Charlie" Rose called from her sleeping palette near a tree. Every night he'd go to her, and she welcomed him with open arms. She'd hold his hand and pray. Being raised in the Catholic Church, he believed there was a God. He took it seriously in front of respectable people, but secretly, he gave in to his heart's dirty desires. Looking at it now, it made him feel even guiltier. But, hearing Rose's prayers every night filled him with something. He couldn't tell exactly what it was, but it was a burning in his chest he'd never felt before and it made him turn his eyes upwards instead of down.

Then there was the bag - Claire's duffle. It stared him down every time he passed by it. No one dared touch it. It was unsaid, but everyone reckoned that if anyone touched it, Charlie would go ballistic. He would have, and he wouldn't be afraid to admit it. That duffle was Claire's, the only thing he had left of her. It stared him down, and that night after the eighth nightmare, he had to open.

Falling on his knees, he carefully unzipped the top. The first thing he found was the beige bucket hat. Thus, my hat - Claire had proclaimed when he was trying to convince her to move to the caves. He had smiled, thinking she looked cute wearing it. The second thing Charlie pulled out threw his world spinning - Claire's diary.

He ran a thumb over the cover. Diaries were supposed to be private, but he wanted to look. No, he needed to look in it. He opened to the first page to see where it started.

_September 18, 2004 I've been bad. I hadn't kept a journal since Thomas left me. That's when I needed to the most! I decided yesterday I'd start again. I'm eight months along. It's so weird to think that my baby will come soon. The psychic I went to keeps calling me and telling me he has a plan to help. I don't know what to do! I'm so confused! I feel like breaking something…like ripping up every painting Thomas ever did. That would make me feel better, but it won't help._

_September 21, 2004 Tomorrow I'm leaving on a plane for Los Angeles in Amercia. He told me there's a family wanting to adopt my baby, but I need to leave tomorrow or something bad will happen. I'm going, only for my baby's sake._

_September 24, 2004 I can't believe I'm even writing this. The plane I was on heading for Los Angeles crashed on a deserted island! Sounds totally insane, but it's true. The number of survivors is unbelievable considering how the plane went down. What I can't believe is that I'm still alive and unhurt. I'm really worried about my baby. It hasn't moved since an explosion knocked me to the ground. I'm sitting here on the beach on a seat from the plane. It feels like a dream. Maybe it is._

_Later… My baby kicked! He's all right! I know he is! Yes, I can feel it's a 'he'. It just came to me after the kick. It was so cute. The Asian man who doesn't speak English had offered me some seafood he caught. Without thinking, I grabbed his hand and made him feel the kicking. He backed away bowing and hurried off. I hope I didn't scare him too badly!_

_September 30, 2004 At least I think that is how long we have been here. The days are starting to blur, especially after yesterday. I fainted on the beach. The doctor (his name being Jack) wasn't around so this girl I've talked to a few times named Kate(or Cate, not sure) took care of me. When she asked for some water to give me, turns out all the water has been stolen. Figures. I slept for who knows how long after that._

_When I woke up, he was there at my side. His name is Charlie, and it seems whenever I'm in need of help, he's there._

Charlie paused. This was the first mention of him in the dairy. He hadn't even thought of her talking about him, but there it was looking back at him. He clenched his fist and went on.

_It's hard to describe him. He's British, for one thing. Kind of twitchy and bumbles sometimes, but that only makes him seem cuter. He helped me carry my bag a few days ago on the beach. That same day I kept catching him looking at me while I let the waves wash over me. I found out he was the first person at my side when I fainted, and would have carried me by himself if I wasn't so heavy with this gigantic boulder in front of me. He found water somewhere in the camp, and brought it to me. We talked for a long time. I'm so thankful to him, because he looked me in the eye. No one has been able to do that here. He looked me in the eye and said he wasn't scared of him and I believe him. He skipped to the last page._

_First week of October 2004 I'm not sure what day it is, but I definitely know it's October. I don't think I've been this frightened since the plane went down. Someone attacked me last night, and tried sticking a needle in my belly. Whoever it was didn't succeed. I screamed my bloody lungs out (listen to me, I'm starting to sound like Charlie). I don't feel safe even with Charlie watching over me all night. He tries his best though…oh, speak of the lil' devil._

Charlie almost laughed through his tears.

_Little later… I think I understand Charlie's motives. He's trying to rescue a damsel in distress, and I don't want to be the damsel. He said he liked me. I hope he truly does. I admit I like him too, but I can't go there. Everything around me is confusing and I don't know what to do. Nothing has really changed from before leaving Australia! My baby will come in the next couple weeks. If it were a boy, I would have named him after Thomas. Of course, that was before he left me. I wasn't planning on it, but I've been giving it a lot of thought ever since Charlie started his taking care of me. I'm going to name my baby - Charles. Not after one man but two. Daddy would be proud to have his only grandson named after him. I miss Daddy terribly. I can't believe it's been four years since he died. I wonder what Charlie will think when I tell him what I want to name my baby. I need to get back to the caves. _

_One more thing: Still on the bloody island. Swallowed a bug today. Love, Claire_

The next page was blank. Only an hour after she had written that, Ethan had taken her. The diary slipped from Charlie's grasp landing atop the duffle. She was going to name the baby after him and her father. They shared the same name. Why hadn't she mentioned it to him?

She liked him too. He wasn't a joke to her, and she didn't think he was useless. Even if she didn't want to be the damsel in distress, she appreciated him taking care of her. Charlie hung his head, wiping tears from his eyes with the heel of his hands. In his nightmares, he had yelled to Claire that he loved her. The thought sent shivers up his spine. He believed that he really said it, but was it out of panic or did he mean it? Every time he replayed that moment in his head, he felt the burning in his chest and knew he really meant it.

That was the last straw. Charlie raised up - like a phoenix out of the ashes, extreme anger welling up from the pit of his stomach. It was nearly dawn. People would start to wake soon. He had to move fast. He quietly strode to Locke's case of knives, lifting the lid. Charlie jumped a foot when a hand clamped down on his shoulder. He spun around, eyes wide and blazing.

"Calm down, son," said Locke, holding a hand up in peace. "What are you up to"

"I need the biggest knife you got," Charlie replied, dangerously. "May I ask what for?" Locke questioned, casually.

"I'm going to find Claire"

There was a pause then Locke moved to his case and pulled out a two-foot knife, and handed it to Charlie. "I wondered when you were going out there." He watched as Charlie pulled the knife's sheath through his belt. He caught Charlie's eye.

"You're the only one who can find her"

Charlie stilled, holding the older man's gaze for several moments. "I know"

"I'll come with you, if you want me to"

"I need to go alone"

Locke nodded. "You'll find her, Charlie"

"Or I'll die trying." With that, he turned and disappeared into the darkness of the jungle.


	3. I am not afraid anymore

The sun rose, and Charlie trudged on - knowing not where he was headed or  
looking back from where he had been. The only thing he had was a feeling, that  
bloody burning in his chest that told him to just keep going.

By sunset, weariness began to sink in his bones and he finally stopped to sit on  
a fallen tree. He slid the backpack off his sore shoulders, groaning. The only  
things he had bothered to pack were a few papayas, a bottle of water, and his  
hooded shirt. He pulled a papaya from the pack, ready to cut into it, when a  
whimpering caught his ear. He discarded the papaya, and jumped to his feet -  
knife held in front ready for anything.

Charlie crept through the brush as soundlessly as he could, but was not very  
successfully. He cringed every time something cracked or crinkled. His breath  
froze in his throat when he finally came upon a figure, shadowed in the dim  
light. He wasn't just anyone. He knew that figure. He'd seen it for weeks.

The knife dropped from Charlie's hand, causing a thud. The figure turned  
immediately, and it was her. Claire stared at him with wide, frightened eyes as  
her lip quivered.

"Claire," murmured Charlie, tears pricking his eyes. He went to her,  
bending to his knees. Claire still stared at him, not moving.

"Are you coming to take me to heaven?" she asked suddenly.

Charlie's mind halted as his heart broke into a million pieces. Last she had  
seen him, he was hanging from a tree. Of course she'd think he was dead, but did  
she not know that she was alive? "No, I'm alive and so are you. I've come  
to take you back to the caves."

"My baby." Claire ran a hand over her flat belly. Charlie looked down,  
horror filling him. She wasn't pregnant. "What happened to me?"

Charlie's gaze shot to her face again. "You don't remember?"

Claire shook her head, bursting into sobs and crying over and over again for her  
baby. Charlie pulled her to him, something he had wanted to do for so long but  
not for this reason. Claire wept into his chest until she was hiccupping and her  
eyes were swollen. Charlie led her to the spot where his backpack was, and tried  
to feed her some papaya. She wouldn't eat, but accepted the water. He asked her  
to try to remember what happened, but Claire just shook her head.

"Did I leave my baby?" she asked, miserably. "How could I do such  
a thing?"

"Claire," Charlie started, carefully. "What if your baby didn't  
survive?"

She turned to him so sharply, eyes burning, that he leaned back in surprise.  
"He's alive," Claire said, through gritted teeth, "I feel him. I  
would know if my baby were dead. I would know."

"I believe you," Charlie replied, hurriedly, "but we don't know  
where he is."

"Then we need to find him!" Determination flashed over Claire's face.  
"I am not going back to the caves until I find my baby."

Charlie nodded, knowing he couldn't break her decision. He'd follow her through  
fire and brimstone without a second's thought.

He couldn't see her face in the darkness. He could barely see around him, but  
Charlie would be ready for anything coming for her. He had one purpose in life.  
One purpose - that if he had been born just for it, living through all the hell  
in his life would be worth it - to protect Claire. He wasn't perfect for the  
job, but he knew deep inside that no life was led without mistakes or failures.

Claire had fallen asleep on his shoulder, overwhelmed and exhausted. He laid her  
gently on the ground, and settled on the log he had found earlier. For a few  
hours, all was silent and Charlie was thankful for that. But then, Claire had  
begun to stir. It started with some shifting that soon enough led to talking in  
her sleep.

"You can't take him. You can't take my baby from me! No, no, no, no…"

"Claire!"

"NO!" She batted at Charlie. A sickening feeling of déjà vu boiled in  
his stomach.

"Claire, calm down!" He caught her face in his hands. "You're  
here with me."

Claire dissolved into sobs. "I remember what happened. They let me hold him  
and feed him, but they'd take him away from me. I'd try to fight, but couldn't.  
They were too strong. Then she came."

Charlie's eyebrows knitted together, and he pulled Claire closer. "Who is  
'she'?"

"A woman with long graying hair and wild eyes. She took my baby, and said I  
was of no use anymore. Ethan stuck a needle in my arm, and I woke up in the  
jungle all alone until you found me."

"We'll get him back. We'll find Charles."

Claire pulled away. "How do you know his name?"

Charlie lowered his head, ashamed. "I read your diary. It stared me in the  
face until I couldn't stand it any longer. I'm not sorry I did, because it made  
me go off alone to wander the jungle looking for you."

"It's okay, Charlie. It doesn't matter," Claire replied. She touched  
his bristly cheek. "My baby is safe in my arms, but I'm not safe without  
you."

"Even if I failed you once?"

"I failed to protect my baby."

Charlie slipped a hand behind her neck. "No, Claire, you couldn't help  
that!"

"Just like you couldn't help protect me."

Charlie heaved. He needed that reminder. The burning in his chest flared. It was  
telling him something, but he couldn't tell yet. They were both being given a  
second chance.

Just then, a rumbling came from the distance. Charlie and Claire snapped their  
heads around, peering into the jungle. They knew that sound. They had heard it  
the first night on the island.

Charlie was first to regain his bearings. He tugged at Claire's arm. "Come  
on, Claire. We need to get of here," he hissed in her ear. But, Claire  
didn't budge. She stared into the darkness as if mesmerized. "Claire,"  
Charlie continued, desperately. "Come on."

Claire wrenched her arm from his grasp, and shot off into the jungle. Charlie  
gasped, stumbling through the brush after her. He called her name, but she kept  
going. His mind cried out in fear of losing her again.

In an instant, he came upon her, almost slamming right into Claire.

"LEAVE US ALONE!" she screamed into the darkness. Somehow she had  
found sticks and rocks on the ground, flinging them at the unknown monster they  
knew were coming toward them. A mechanical roar echoed off the trees. "I'M  
NOT AFRAID OF YOU ANYMORE!"

"CLAIRE! We need to go!" Charlie shouted, trying unsuccessfully to  
catch her flailing arms.

The trees parted, nearly snapping in half, and there it was. Claire stopped  
throwing. Her and Charlie raised their eyes to the sight before them. They  
didn't move. All fear was released, replaced with awe beyond imagination.  
Everything seemed so clear now as if taking a peek through the eye of the  
Creator. The crash, the island…everything made sense.

All too soon, it was gone.

"That was amazing," said Charlie, barely audible.

"What did you see?" Claire whispered.

"Us getting through this together. You?"

The slightest smile crept on Claire's lips. "Charles growing up with his  
mommy and daddy."

Charlie turned to her, their faces inches apart. "Thomas?"

"No." Claire shook her head. "You."

Charlie blinked twice, not knowing how to take Claire's revelation. Him and her  
were connected in such a way, it couldn't be explained and yet, it seemed so  
simple. He squeezed Claire's hand.

"We won't fail this time."


End file.
